Now, I'm still a little flustered about this fool in Missouri that tried to bluff me into retracting my statement about some of the funding going into the Shawn Hornbeck Foundation.
So I'd like to give my readers a little background on this heavenly of haven of Hillbillery.
(If this offends you, tough!)
I did a little research on this state (The Show-Me State) of sexual harassment ("Show me your titties!") or idiocy. ("Hey ya'll watch this!")
Here's a list of some of Missouri's proudest, with date to show how some folks never change.
Missouri State Somethings
Animal - Missouri Mule - 1995 (Hmm, interesting start.)
Mineral - Galena - 1967 [Major source of lead ore. (State of the Leadbelt)]
Rock - Mozarkite - 1967 [M(Missouri) + Ozark (the Missouri Ozarks) + ite]
Aquatic Animal - Paddlefish - 1997 (No Carp?)
Song - Missouri Waltz - 1949 (Redneckery? Hillbillery? Yes, but look at the date.)
American Folk Dance - (FOLK DANCE?! Really?!) Square Dance (saw that one coming) - 1995
Musical Instrument - Fiddle - 1987 (The better to square dance with.)(Saving the banjo for Tennessee?)
Fish - Catfish - 1997 (Did you leave ANYTHING for Arkansas?!)
Amphibian - Bullfrog - 2005 (Nope! Took em all.)
Grape - (GRAPE?) Norton/Cynthiana (Why not, lets get drunk, play the fiddle, and square dance.)
Missouri Day - March 22 - 1915 [Celebrating Trout Season? (March 1st)]
I also heard (a few years ago on MJ In The Morning) that Missouri is ranked #6 highest in the country for people having dentures.
That doesn't even count toothless uncle Ed!
So, after careful review of this new information (brought to you by the State of Missouri website) I completely understand how such an ass-hat could get ruffled feathers.
Well, that's all I've got.
I just wanted to poke a bit.
Maybe I'll bring back the controversy.
Don't let 'em getcha.
V.V.
4 comments:
Greedy basticules. They took it all and left nothing for Arkansas. And you failed to note that since there aren't any hills here, we're hip deep in flatbillies. They tend to be more alarming and drive newer cars, but are still as droll. This whole lead bible belt thing is just scary. I'm glad I'm not from here.
Much easier to read now. Those of us with old eyes thank you. I still feel like Oliver Twist, tho.... I want more!
Dear Oliver,
I asked earlier on if anyone had suggestions.
I finally decided to take the plunge to easier to read.
P.S. You can't have anymore. We're out.
Love,
Vince
Dammit! I wanted more! And you said you were all out, yet there was more anyway! Fibber! -Oliver
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